Yessenia Vargas

April 25th, 2015

Ms. Reyes

I recall often sitting on my desk in middle-school, staring at the other girls and wanting to be just like them. They were so different from me, I had small breast and the other girls had breast that showed through their V-neck shirts. They had butts that would make any guy turn around just to take a look, but that wasn't the case for me. I often thought there was something wrong with those girls, how can these young girls have asses like a grown women when they are only in middle school. But it didn't matter what I thought all the guys loved it, and the girls loved the attention they received from them. Their jeans were completely filled with their asses and their womanly figure while my body delayed to develop. I had something there but it was never enough to make guys turn to look at me. When i was younger, guys used to liked me because they thought I was cute but after a while that stopped; all the other girls around me became women while I lagged behind becoming unwanted and unnoticed. I remember often sitting near guys and listening to their conversations. They will speak of how big that girl's ass was or how nice her boobs were, but I was never one of those girls that they spoke about. The girls around me will speak about their bra size changing rapidly and how their boobs became larger and larger, but I was stuck with the same bra size for almost a whole year. I then got a great idea, which was to buy bra that was a size bigger than mine with padding which will make my boobs look bigger than they actually were. At first it felt right, they did look bigger but felt fake. The other girls boobs looked real, their bra didn't completely cover their boobs, so you can see their cleavage through their low cut shirts; while mine were completely covered by my bra leaving nothing to be seen. I often wondered what in the world was wrong with me. Most of my friends looked like fully grown woman while I still looked like a 5th grader trapped inside the body of a 7th grader. After every summer vacation, these girls returned with everything a bigger size than last year. While mine appeared to grow, but only a tiny bit. I then came to the conclusion that the reason behind the slow development I have undergone, was due to the fact that I was skinny. I started eating even more than usual, in the hopes that my boobs and ass will grow but it was a failure. Eventually I gave up and stopped trying, and let nature run its course in the hopes that I would attract males with my assets and possess the womanly figure I always desire. I did often wonder whether or not I actually wanted these things or if it was only because the other girls wanted them and those guys desired it. My desire was to fit in so once again I will be liked and wouldn't have to worry about looking different from everyone else.

Yessenia Vargas

Ms. Reyes

April 19th, 2015

Middlesex blog post 1: Key Passage Response

The prostitute scene serves to highlight the empathy Callie feels for the prostitutes. As Callie observes the prostitutes he pities them as they have no choice but to submit their bodies to awful acts that maybe many of them do not want to. As Cal describes his surroundings, “It isn't easy to keep yourself clean on the street... They're numb, too, to thoughts of babies left at home, six-month-olds with bad colds lying in used cribs, sucking on pacifiers, and having a hard time breathing” (236-237). Cal acknowledges that these woman are submitting their bodies only for sex and in return all they will receive is money. He understands that doing this job must be extremely difficult as it requires these women to make sacrifices in order to be able to perform this job. Women must expose their bodies to many men in order to get their attention, in the hopes of being the lucky one to be taken. Due to the actions that these women perform it becomes difficult to keep themselves clean as they have to sleep around with many men. The use of the phrase, “it isn’t easy to keep yourself clean” (237) highlights that this action is seen as dirty thus causing Cal to feel a sense of empathy for these women. These women have to leave their babies at home alone just to sell their bodies to try and make money to survive. The use of the words, “bad colds”, and “hard time breathing” (236-237) emphasizes the severity of the problem. These phrases are used in order to create an image that makes the reader see the awful situation, thus emphasizing Cal's feeling of condolence for these women. Women that do take part in this job, are often looked down upon or shunned from society because it is seen as morally wrong. Most women that resort to prostitution do so for the need of money not because they want to. Both Cal and the reader feel a sense of pity for these women through the awful acts they have to submit their bodies to and the extreme sacrifices that no mother will want to make.